Yay yay yay! I get to open the envelopes early! Say, why is this thing so buttery?

Be the star of your own romance novel with the Lusty Scoundrel! Stand in front of a beautiful sunset with a swooning hunk or maiden by your side, then butter yourself up so that every muscle and curve glistens in the light. Phew, I need to slow down here.


[Excerpt from Pg. 192 of The Lusty Scoundrel]: She slapped Beresford hard across the face, her gloved hand breaking like a velvet wave upon his violently outcropping cheekbone. "But what of Rodrigo? What of my marriage, my family, my delicately perfumed bosom?" Beresford's baritone laughter echoed through the masculine caverns of his barrel-like chest. "Forget Rodrigo," he commanded, clutching Heloise even tighter against his glistening, rippled thorax. "Rodrigo may be rich and almost equally as handsome as I, but there's one thing he can never give you." Slowly, Beresford's rugged, stable-worn hands began to palpate the blushing flesh of Heloise's shoulders. "Really good backrubs," he bellowed; "I got a certificate from the city college!"


Get ready to lead armies into battle with War of the Warlords, a collection of clothing worn by some of history's greatest commanders. Reenact the Crossing of the Rubicon dressed as Caesar, battle across the steppes as Genghis Khan, stalk the night as the terrible Vlad the Impaler, or tear up Europe in Napoleon's legendary hat!


[Excerpt from Pg. 258 of War of the Warlords]: Vlad gazed at the blood-soaked battlefield, slavering at the gruesome sight before him. "Calm yourself," said Genghis Khan, worried his unholy alliance might not survive the Impaler's demonic thirst. "Napoleon and Caesar are formidable opponents. We cannot allow Caesar's legions to overwhelm our eastern flank." Vlad nodded in agreement. "We cannot, Khan, nor can we allow Napoleon to storm my castle." There was a hushed silence and a cold wind. Khan looked at his partner, knowing he was under a great deal of stress. Suddenly his hands reached out, landing firmly on Vlad's tense shoulders. "I give really good backrubs," Khan bellowed. "I got a certificate from the city college!"



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